26--RMWVL, Part 7: The Prosecutor-turned-defender

October 20.

Mason’s Office, Legal Complex, Palace of Power, VideoLand.

s Perry Mason, Della Street, and Hamilton Burger entered Perry’s office in the new Legal Complex of the Palace of Power in VideoLand through the normal way, a code knock sounded on the private door. “That must be Paul,” Perry said. “Please go get it, Della.” Della nodded. When she opened the door, Paul came in.

“Good morning,” Paul said with a winning smile. “How are you?”

“Fine, Paul,” nodded Perry. “And how might you be?”

“Oh, I’m okay. I called up Tragg and had him follow that lead.”

“Okay, Paul, thank you.”

“What lead?” Hamilton asked. “What’s wrong, Perry?”

“That’s why I asked you here, Hamilton. I got a lead on where Metroid’s source of power may be, and I had Paul call Tragg in the VideoLand Police Department and tell him about the lead. How long ago did you do that, Paul?”

“About half an hour ago,” said the detective.

The phone rang. It was in fact hooked into the Palace’s communications system, but it was in the form of a telephone for Perry’s comfort level. Della picked it up. “Hello, this is Perry Mason’s office. Della Street, his secretary, speaking. What can I do for you? . . . Okay, hang on a minute.” She handed the receiver to Perry. “It’s Lieutenant Tragg, Perry. He wants to chew you out.”

“That’s odd.” Perry lifted the receiver to his ear and mouth. “Hello, Tragg. What’s—”

“Cut the sweet talk,” Tragg snapped. “What kind of a bum steer have you given me this time, Perry? My men looked all over the blasted place, and we did not find any possible source of power.”

“You don’t have to shout.”

“Shout my foot. This is awfully mild compared to what some other people have to say. Your lead was a complete waste of time. To inferno with your stupid leads. If you say next time that you have solid evidence that will lead us to Ludwig’s source of power, we will consider it then, but don’t simply give us a darn lead. You’d better feel lucky that Andy isn’t ticked off with you.” Perry heard a click. He hung up the phone.

“What did he have to say?” Hamilton asked.

“I’ll be darned. They didn’t find a shred of evidence that showed that the place contained a source of power for the Brain-Team.”

“Was he mad?”

“Boy, was he ever angry, but he said others were angrier.”

“Okay, Perry. Next time, though, I suggest that you not just give him a lead. Samus is the chief of the Vice Squad. Maybe she can aid you. She’s more mild-mannered, except towards Tragg.”

“Okay, Hamilton. I’ll try that.” He dialed up the police department. “Chief Aran of the Vice Squad, please.”

In a moment, a very low female voice greeted him. “This is Chief Samus Aran of the Vice Squad.”

“Samus, this is Perry Mason. Could you help me?”

“Sure, Perry. What is it?”

“I have discovered a piece of evidence that would indicate that an item from which MotherBrain has been gaining power for Metroid is present on the planet Zebes.”

“Okay, Perry. I’ll get out there imm—wait a second. That blasted Lieutenant Tragg just stepped in. Could you wait a moment?”

“Sure, Samus. I’ll wait.” He covered the mouthpiece with his hand. “Lieutenant Tragg has entered her office.”

“Oh, no,” Hamilton said with a smile. “This must be the calm before the storm.”

Samus got back on the line with Perry in a moment. “Perry, Tragg just said that you pulled him a so‑called ‘bum steer’ on Zebes. Is that true?”

“Look, Samus. When Paul called Tragg for me, Paul told Tragg only that I had a lead. When Tragg called me back, he said that I had pulled him a ‘bum steer’ and hung up before I could say a syllable. I do not have merely a lead. I have one piece of evidence to present. It may be only one piece, but it is vital. Will you help me?”

“I’ll try, Perry. I’ll be over at your office within half of an hour with Tragg and Andy.”

“Okay, Samus. I’ll see you later. Goodbye.” He contentedly hung up.

“What did she say, Perry?” Hamilton asked.

“She said that she’d be right over with Tragg and Andy. Fortunately, Tragg said that the only member of the Homicide Squad who was not angry with me was Andy.”

“Okay, Perry. If we’re going to search Zebes, it may be prudent to bring the N‑Team along to help.”

“Right, Hamilton. I’ll call them.” Perry called the N‑Team.

Half an hour later, several N‑Team members were in Perry’s office, as were Samus, Tragg, and Andy. Tragg was clearly still livid. “Perry, if this is a bum steer again, I’ll book you for misleading evidence,” he snapped.

“Shut up, Tragg,” Samus said.

“But, Chief—”

“I said, ‘Shut up.’ That’s a direct order.”

Tragg sighed. “Okay, I’m shutting up.”

“Why did you call us all here, Perry?” Kevin asked.

“I called because I have found evidence of the location of MotherBrain’s power source,” said Perry. “I have reason to believe that it is on Zebes.”

“Perry, the Homicide Squad has searched every inch of the surface of that planet with a comb whose bristles are less than a nanometer apart,” Tragg said. “There was nothing to indicate that the planet could have a power source for the brain’s world!”

“I thought that I told you to be quiet, Lieutenant,” Samus said. “Keep up your arguing, and you will become Sergeant Tragg.”

“Okay, okay!”

“Perry, could you show us this evidence of yours?” Andy asked.

Perry turned on a video screen. “With pleasure, Andy.” The screen showed a place on the Planet Zebes where cosmic rays extremely high in frequency were emerging from the surface. Facts and figures showing the power output were off the charts.

“Why, if that doesn’t beat all,” Tragg said in wonder. “The device we used did not detect any radiation from that spot.”

“That must be because your device could not pick up the extremely high-powered cosmic radiation emitted by that location,” Perry said.

“Good Lord,” Paul Drake exclaimed. “If we can grab the source of that, we’d have the Brain-Team at their knees.”

“How did you find out about that, Perry?” Tragg asked. “Certainly you have no ordinary detector.”

Perry smiled. “I ordered the best and I got the best. Cost me a pretty penny, too, even with the N‑Team’s substantial discount arrangement with Dr. Wright. But it’s worth it. Have you any of this kind of equipment?”

“Well, no,” Tragg admitted. “The Homicide Squad does not have any cosmic-ray-tracking equipment yet.” He glanced angrily at Samus. “Unlike some people!”

“Hey,” said Samus. “We don’t have that sort of equipment, either, so don’t chew me out.”

“I shall have to rectify that with the budget committee immediately,” Lana said. “They always were a bunch of greedy penny-pinchers.”

Prince Roy (Spike)Koopa, who had been promoted to chief of the Larceny Squad, stepped forward. “The Larceny Squad has some portable cosmic-ray-tracking equipment, Perry. Will that do?”

“How low in wavelength can it go, Roy?” asked Perry.

“Hmm. If I remember correctly, the best piece of equipment can go to a wavelength of about one one-quintillionth of a nanometer.”

“Excellent, Roy. That’s better than my equipment. Retrieve that piece if it is available. This time, I believe that the Brain-Team may suffer a great loss.”

* * *

Control Room, Metroid.

On the evil world of Metroid about two hours later, a meeting was called by the Brain-Team’s infamous and nefarious leader, Prince Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa. The whole Brain-Team was present. “Well, Ludwig, at least they have not found the part that is most critical to our rule: the power source of Metroid,” Bowser said.

“That may be true, Dad, but with our heretofore ill fortune, they probably will at any instant,” Ludwig said.

“So, you have a plan?” asked Bowser.

“Naturally,” said Ludwig. “Larry will go to the planet Zebes. He will then grab Hamilton Burger, the prosecutor, and bring him to me.”

“Excellent,” Larry said. “You will then either hypnotize him or transfer brains with him. Next, you will influence him to commit a crime or will commit a crime while in his body. Last, you will release him from hypnosis or re‑transfer brains. It will make it look like he committed the crime.” He laughed. “You are a genius.”

“Excellent perceptions, Larry. I shall go with the latter. I shall also go with the worst of all crimes: premeditated murder!”

“Oh, what a devious plan. Then, if he is convicted, he’ll go to life imprisonment.”

“Not even an eyewitness will know about this evil plan,” MotherBrain said with a titter. “It is foolproof. Not even the great Perry Mason could prove that we framed Hamilton Burger.” Panels along the wall shone yellow. A steady hum marked yellow-alert. “Someone has found our power source.” She turned on the screen. “Ha, ha! The whole stage is set. The turkey is ready to roast.”

Ludwig smiled in admiration. “Such great word choices. Well, Larry, get out there and grab me Hamilton Burger. Let’s keep a communication link open constantly.”

Larry saluted. “Yes, O evilly devious brother.” Larry left through the warp marked ‘Zebes.’

Ludwig grinned most wickedly. “It will only be a matter of time, Mr. Prosecutor, before you are mine. Mine! Mine! Ha, ha, ha! This is because I have sent one of my best men on the job.”

“How about the new cloak?” Bowser asked.

“Engage it,” ordered Ludwig. “We’ll see if it works this time.” Bowser did so. On the outside, Metroid seemed to melt out of view. It became invisible. “Well?”

“We’ve cloaked the planet thermally, visibly, and electromagnetically,” said Bowser.

“Success,” Ludwig shouted. “The cloaking device is a success! It’s about bloody time, too.”

* * *

Planet Zebes.

The N‑Team arrived on the mountainous surface of Zebes at a barren high altitude. At the place releasing the power, Roy (Spike)Koopa stopped with his cosmic-ray-detection device. “There you go, Perry,” said Roy with a smile. “This is where the energy is being released.”

Kevin looked in. “Wow. This must go deep, into the center of the planet.”

Perry pulled him back. “Be careful! Any more exposure to the cosmic rays may blind you or damage your skin.”

“I know,” Kevin said.

Roy made some calculations with his device. “According to my cosmic-radiation-tracking device, the true source is indeed well within the center of the planet. Down there, the frequency of the cosmic radiation is almost too high to be tracked by this device. Very high energy, indeed. Just a little of this energy could serve Metroid’s needs for a year.”

“Okay, guys,” Hamilton said. “Let’s go down there. If Perry’s theory is correct, we should find the source down there.”

“Wait a minute,” Simon said. “We may need a few lookouts out here.”

“That’s a great idea, Simon,” said Princess Lana. “Ludwig and his fellow foul brood may come out here. And so may Metroid if Ludwig’s got his cloaking device working right.”

“If it is all right with you, Chief,” Larry (Spike)Koopa said, “I’ll stay and look out for those evil perpetrators.”

“Okay, Larry,” Samus said. “You do so. You have become, after all, one of the best officers on the Vice Squad.”

“Thanks, Chief.”

“Roll and I shall also stay,” MegaMan said. “We’ll mega-blast anyone who gets too close.”

“Lend me a laser-pistol, Tragg,” said Hamilton. “I’m licensed, and I’ll blast anyone before they find us.” Tragg did so.

“I’ll stay and watch for those evil characters,” said Kevin.

“All right,” Link said. “The rest of us had better go.” The ones who had volunteered to stay on the surface stayed. The rest took a secret passage to the middle of the planet. The ones who stayed on the surface spread out to different points of this region of the planet’s surface, except MegaMan and Roll stayed together.

* * *

Control Room, Metroid.

Back on the cloaked planet Metroid, Ludwig was watching with great pleasure. He laughed when they split up. “They’ve spread out all over that area. The warps will work while Metroid is cloaked. We’ll have that prosecutor before he can say, ‘I object, Thine Honor.’ Ha, ha, ha!”

* * *

Planet Zebes.

On Zebes, Larry (Bowser)Koopa materialized behind a boulder near Hamilton Burger. Burger was watching his area carefully, but he did not notice the sneaky Koopaling. His radio beeped with a transmission. “Hello, this is Hamilton Burger.”

Kid Icarus answered. “Hello, Hamilton. This is Kid Icarus. How go things up there‑icus?”

“Pretty calm, Kid Icarus. I have seen no one up here besides us. How about things down there?”

“Fine. We’re near the core‑icus. When we get there, we’ll blow that energy source.”

“Fine.”

“Over and out‑icus,” Kid Icarus said. The transmission was then cut.

“It’s too calm up here, in fact. Ludwig and his army should be here by now.”

Larry contacted Ludwig. “This is Larry to Ludwig. Come in, O devious brother.”

“Hello, Larry,” Ludwig said. “How are things going?”

“Fine. Ol’ Hamilton, however, expects our presence. He believes that we should be here by now.”

“Then let’s not disappoint him. Fill his lungs with sleeping powder, grab him, and warp him back here.”

“Will do, Ludwig,” Larry said, and cut the transmission. He got out a bag of Ludwig’s powerful sleeping dust and sprinkled it so that the wind carried it right into Hamilton Burger’s nose.

“Getting dusty,” said Hamilton. In a moment, he sneezed, yawned, and crashed to the ground, asleep. Larry leapt out, grabbed him, and carried him in the warp to Metroid.

* * *

Ludwig’s Laboratory, adjacent to the Control Room, Metroid.

On Metroid, Ludwig carried out stage two of his plan: transferring his brain with Hamilton’s. When the transfer ended, Ludwig awakened up in Hamilton’s body, and Hamilton was sleeping in Ludwig’s body. “Perfect,” Ludwig said, even more pleased that he heard Hamilton’s voice instead of his own. “When I take him to the scene of the crime in his own body, I shall reawaken him. In the meantime, make sure that he stays asleep while I’m gone.”

“Right, Ludwig,” Larry said. “I shall tell everyone that everything is going as planned.”

Within Hamilton’s body, Ludwig nodded and left through the warp to Zebes.

* * *

Planet Zebes.

Once on Zebes in Hamilton’s body, Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa did as Hamilton was supposed to do. Meanwhile, the N‑Team arrived in the depths of Zebes’s core.

“Wow,” Iggy (Spike)Koopa said.

“This must be the core,” said Lemmy.

“So correct,” said Roy.

“It’s apparent that MotherBrain fortified this place before using the planet as her fortress,” Link said. “If we get through the barrier constructed here, it will be little effort to destroy the core.”

“Well, everyone, let’s find a way to destroy it,” Wendy said. “I’m beginning to feel claustrophobic.”

“Easy, Wendy,” Morton said. “We shall.”

“Yes,” Ludwig said. He carefully looked around.

Andy got out a bullet-loaded pistol. “Maybe some good, old-fashioned bullets will put a crimp in this thing’s style.” He fired the gun at the core barrier, but the bullets harmlessly bounced off.

“Then again,” Spike said, “maybe not.”

“Mario, maybe Hammer Brother Hammers will work,” Luigi said.

“It’s worth a try, Luigi,” said Mario. They put on Hammer Brother Suits and then threw hammers at the core barrier, but they, too, harmlessly bounced off.

“Apparently, Hammers are out, too,” Toad said.

“Perhaps my energy-arrows will work,” Zelda said. When she drew her bow and pulled back the bowstring, an energy arrow formed in the proper place. She aimed and let go of the string, sending the arrow at the cosmic-ray-producing core. All that happened when the energy-arrow struck the core was a splat sound similar to the sound of a Tetris block landing in the game Tetris.

“Energy arrows no work, either,” Yoshi said.

“Spike, I know you’re not too keen on using your magical powers, but can you try your scepter?” Peach asked.

“Sure,” Spike said. “I’ll fix that core.” He drew his scepter, aimed it at the core, and fired. This ray destroyed the core, and the energy source for Metroid was destroyed.

“We did it‑icus,” Kid Icarus cried.

“Yes,” Lana said. But before the team could begin to celebrate, the ground began to rumble. “Uh, oh. We sure did! What’s that?”

“The base on this planet is about to blow,” Roy said. “We can get out of here if we hurry.”

“Then what are we waiting for?”

They all raced out. During their dash, they contacted the ones who had remained on the surface. The whole N‑Team met at the warp to the Palace of Power, and so, too, did Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa in Hamilton Burger’s body. They all then warped to the Palace.

Seconds later, the base on Planet Zebes exploded.

* * *

Control Room, Metroid.

On Metroid, MotherBrain watched this event nervously. “Well, there goes our good old source of power.”

The rest of the Brain-Team entered the room. Wisenheimer wheeled in a device. “And here comes the good new source of power!”

“Good work, Wisenheimer {wahy-zehn-hahy-muhr},” Bowser said.

“That’s Wisenheimer {vih-zehn-hahy-mehr},” the wizard bellowed.

Bowser was still understandably upset with Wisenheimer. He got out his scepter and fried the wizard with a strong electrical blast. “Do not presume to correct me, Wisenheimer {vih-zehn-hahy-mehr}. I can call you whatever I want to call you. So, shut up, you whimpering sap.”

“Okay, okay. You sure can, Your Royal Greenness.”

The evil Doctor Wily approached the device that Wizenheimer had wheeled in. “This device is a work of pure genius, if I do say so myself. And since I designed this machine, I do say it.”

“What does it do?” Eggplant Wizard asked.

“Well, uh, it—what does it do, ProtoMan?” asked King Hippo.

ProtoMan sighed. “It generates electrical power from nuclear energy, you space cadets. It uses nuclear fusion to combine single atoms. Then, it uses high-speed neutrons to split the helium nuclei, therefore causing two nuclear reactions for the price of one. It also generates more power and less nuclear waste that way. This power source is far better than what we were using.”

“Yes,” Roy said. “With this, we need no other source of electricity. It will generate ten thousand times more power than the cosmic radiation.”

“So, when we lost Zebes, we suffered no major loss?” Wendy asked.

“Exactly, Your Prettiness,” Mouser said. “The explosion on Zebes was part of Ludwig’s plan to get Burger on the wrong side of the tracks.”

“What is nucular fusion?” a Koopa-Troopa asked.

“That is nuclear, not nucular,” said Morton. “And nuclear fusion is the process by which two atomic nuclei combine. Most nuclei in this machine only contain one proton. That is a protium nucleus, or the nucleus of a hydrogen atom with an atomic mass of one. Only protons and neutrons contribute to the atomic mass.”

“Sure. Uh, I knew that,” Try-Clyde said.

“So, since we have made this the power source for Metroid—” Lemmy said.

“—we need not have another power source,” finished Iggy.

“Such brain-children I’ve brought up, MotherBrain,” Bowser said. Of course, the five youngest Koopalings only knew so much because Ludwig and Larry had taught them well.

Mother Koopa warped into the room. “Right, for once. They surely do not take after you, you fool.”

Bowser turned to her. “Mama! What a wonderful surprise. I didn’t know that you were coming for a visit, or I would have—”

“Can the pleasantries, Bowser,” she interrupted. “If I wanted to gab with someone, I would have gone to the gossip fence back home.” Larry showed her to a seat. “I’m so glad that your children have not become as dumb as you.”

“Now wait a minute, Mother,” MotherBrain said. “If he were dumb, he would not have married me.”

“You have a point, MotherBrain,” Mother Koopa complied. Of course, the longer her son was married to MotherBrain, the more she felt that Bowser had been greatly mistaken to marry the cerebrum. Unfortunately, he was still so madly in love with the evil brain that she knew better than to argue with him. “I am sorry. Hey! What became of Ludwig?”

“My darling stepson is performing a devious plot,” MotherBrain said.

“Yes,” interjected Bowser, “so why don’t you take a hike?”

“Why, I’ve never been so insulted in my whole life,” Mother Koopa said. “And by my own flesh and blood!”

“Chill out, Dad and Grandmom,” said Larry. “I get nervous when you fight.”

“Their fighting makes me nervous, too,” MotherBrain said.

“You heard the lady,” Mother Koopa said.

“Yes, well, you started it,” Bowser said.

“How did I start it?”

“You started it by coming here for a visit!”

“Well, excu-u-u-use me!”

“There isn’t any darned excuse for you!”

“Both of you shut up,” everyone else cried. “What is wrong with you two?”

“Oh, what I would give to have Ludwig here to settle this argument,” MotherBrain said.

Larry nodded. “True. I hope, though, that his scheme is working like a dream. Ha, ha, ha! I know that the cloaking device is.”

* * *

October 23.

Perry Mason’s Office, Legal Complex, Palace of Power.

In Hamilton Burger’s office, Donovan Fraser, Hamilton Burger’s deputy attorney, eyed the prosecutor in a cautious manner. He had never seen Hamilton exhibiting his current behavior until now.

He knew that something was amiss. Rather than coming in and saying the usual fairly friendly “Hello” or “Good morning” to Fraser, Hamilton walked by, nodded his head, and went straight into his office. Hamilton could be a bit short while working on a trial case, but he was not currently.

Finally, after a couple of days, Fraser went through the door marked “Perry Mason—Attorney at Law.” Going over to Perry’s receptionist, he asked to see the lawyer. She phoned Perry, and, in a moment, Della came out. “Good morning, Deputy Prosecuting Attorney Fraser,” Della said. “It is an honor to have you here. What can we do for you?”

“Good morning, Miss Street. I hope that Mr. Mason can squeeze me into his schedule.”

Della made an inward motion with her hand. “Well, come right in. We have time for a visit.” She and Fraser entered the office.

“Good morning, Deputy Prosecuting Attorney Fraser. What brings you to my office?” said Perry.

Fraser and Perry shook hands, and then Fraser got down to business. “Good morning. It’s about Hamilton,” Fraser said. “He’s been acting strangely.” He sat down in the chair in front of Perry’s desk when Perry indicated it.

“What can I do, Fraser?” asked Perry. “Is there any more specific evidence you can give me?”

“Well, as a matter of fact,” Fraser said, “I do have more specific evidence. The mere fact that Hamilton used to greet me every single morning and then stopping very abruptly could possibly be evidence.”

“Evidence of what?” Perry asked.

“Well, evidence that he—dare I say it—is literally ‘not himself.’ ”

“Go on.”

“It began the day after you blew up Zebes. He has even been writing with his left hand. The last time I checked, he was right-handed.”

“That’s right. Hamilton is right-handed. For him to change suddenly to being left-handed is highly irregular. He isn’t ambidextrous, as far as I know. Della, check something for me, will you?”

“What do you need?” Della asked.

“I want you to find out if any of our adversaries is left-handed or ambidextrous.”

“Okay,” Della said. “I’ll get on it.” She left through the door going directly to the hallway.

“And what shall I do, Perry?” asked Fraser.

“Well, I suggest you play it safe, Assistant Attorney,” said Perry with a smile. “Don’t do anything rash. If you do decide that you must do something, make sure that Lieutenant Tragg, Lieutenant Anderson, Chief Aran, Chief Roy (Spike)Koopa, or Lieutenant Larry (Spike)Koopa is with you.”

“Okay, Perry. Thank you very much. I’ll see you later.” Fraser and Perry shook hands. Fraser then left.

Soon afterwards, a code knock sounded on the private door. Perry opened the door to admit Paul Drake. “Hello, Paul,” Perry said. “What’s up?”

“Hello,” Paul said. “Nothing much at the moment. Did I miss someone you were speaking with?”

“Yes, you just missed him. The Assistant Attorney for VideoLand, Donovan Fraser.”

“That guy who used to be such an eager-beaver?”

“That’s right. He’s an excellent litigator now. He reported several strange actions of Hamilton Burger, including the fact that Hamilton began writing with his left hand.”

“Wow. Do you mean to tell me that Hamilton is ambidextrous now?”

“That’s not very likely. I just sent Della to see if any of our adversaries writes with his or her left hand or is ambidextrous.”

“Actually, Perry, I just checked the records out of curiosity. There is only one possible suspect among our enemies: Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa. He is ambidextrous, though he usually writes left-handed.”

“Are you sure, Paul?”

“Absolutely, Perry. Remember that the dirty, rotten rat made a device which transferred brains once before?”

“Of course. I guess that he saw his opportunity. While we were on Zebes, he came, grabbed Hamilton, and switched brains with him, planning to commit a crime in his body. He would then restore the brains and make it look as though Hamilton committed the crime.”

“You’re a brain-child, Perry. They have Hamilton down at headquarters.”

“Headquarters?”

“Yes. He was found having committed first-degree-murder.”

“Against whom?”

“One of his assistant attorneys in the lower ranks. Hamilton wrote out a confession with his left hand.” Suddenly, while Paul ended his first sentence in the middle of his explanation, the phone on Perry’s desk rang crazily three times.

“Uh, oh, Paul. Here comes—” Before Perry could finish, Lieutenant Arthur Tragg and Lieutenant Andy Anderson came in.

“Well, well, well,” exclaimed Tragg. “You will not be making a fool of me twice. We have Hamilton Burger down at headquarters. He signed a confession which stated that he murdered his lowest-ranking assistant attorney.”

“With which hand did he sign the confession?” asked Perry.

“You know darn well that it doesn’t make one bit of a difference,” Tragg blurted out. Then, the torch lit above his head, so to speak. “Wait a minute. I did notice something funny, now that you mention it. Hamilton signed the confession with his left hand. He’s right-handed, and he isn’t ambidextrous!”

“I am glad you noticed, Tragg. It makes my theory most legitimate.”

“What theory? Oh! You’re not going to get us caught so that the Homicide Squad looks stupid again, Perry.”

“I never intended that, Lieutenant, and I apologize that it ever happened. My theory concerns the possibility that, while we were at Zebes, Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa captured Hamilton, switched brains with him, and returned and committed that murder to make it like Hamilton did it. Paul did research and found out that Ludwig is our only adversary in VideoLand who could write with his left hand.”

“Your theory, Perry, is the best possible explanation,” Andy said. “Now, let us test it. Paul, would you be kind enough to go to Her Highness, Princess Lana, and ask her for a search warrant?”

“Sure, Andy,” said Paul, “but where do you want to search?”

“I have the distinct feeling that MotherBrain will be very upset when we invade Metroid with that search warrant.”

Paul smiled, “Good thinking, Andy. I’ll be going.” Paul left.

In a few minutes, Della returned to Perry’s office. Perry explained the situation to her. “So, I wasted my time,” Della said with good humor.

“Well, Della, if I had known that Paul knew the information, I wouldn’t have sent you,” Perry said.

“That’s okay. It was a good workout.”

Paul soon returned, prizing a data pad. “I got the search warrant,” he said. “Now, let’s get into Metroid and search like crazy.”

“Right,” agreed Perry. “We’ll search that planet upside-down if need be.”

* * *

Control Room, Metroid.

Later, on Metroid, MotherBrain decided to decloak the planet. A few minutes after she had done that, the doorbell rang. MotherBrain smiled. “Well, well. We have guests. Let them in, Eggplant Wizard.”

Eggplant Wizard went over to the door. “Yes, Queen MotherBrain.” He cautiously opened the door. “Who’s there?”

Lieutenant Tragg thrust open the door. When it hinged back, it squashed Eggplant Wizard against the wall. “The entire Homicide Squad is here, MotherBrain. We have a warrant. Tell us where Hamilton Burger’s brain is, and we’ll go easy on you.”

“My lips are zipped,” she said.

“So are mine,” Morton said. “I won’t say a word. Not one single word. It’s none of my never-mind where Hamilton Burger’s brain is. It is not I who should tell you. I don’t go poking my nose in other people’s business, nosirree.”

Secretly, Lieutenant Tragg activated his portable audio recorder. Morton seemed oblivious of the increasing glare that MotherBrain was giving him.

“I am not telling you that Larry put Hamilton Burger to sleep on Zebes and brought him here so Ludwig could transfer brains with him and go, in Hamilton’s body, back to Zebes and murder someone. It was not my idea. Hamilton Burger’s brain is in Ludwig’s body. Ludwig’s brain is in Hamilton Burger’s body. Hamilton Burger’s body is in your stinking police department, and Ludwig’s body is in his bedroom here on Metroid. But, as I said, I won’t say a word. Not one single word.” MotherBrain rolled her eyes. “You said you had a search warrant?”

Andy got the warrant out of his coat. “Yes, Morton. This is it. By this search warrant, we can search anywhere on this brain-shaped planet we want to. You are also to give us anything we need that you have and to remain decloaked.”

“Oh, all right,” MotherBrain said with a disdainful tone. “Perform your little search.” Andy and Perry went into Ludwig’s room. They saw Ludwig’s body on his bed. Perry awakened him.

“Oh, where am I?” ‘Ludwig’ asked. He looked up at Perry and Andy. “Hello, Perry. Hello, Andy. Where in the world am I?”

“Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa’s body and bedroom,” said Perry, his face totally devoid of expression. For some reason, he wanted to laugh his head off.

Hamilton Burger sprang out of Ludwig’s bed and looked in the mirror. “What? How did this happen?”

“Calm down, Hamilton,” Andy said. “Larry (Bowser)Koopa put a sleeping spell on you and dragged you back to Metroid. Here, Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa exchanged brains with you and left for Zebes. He has just committed a crime in your body.”

“Whom did he kill?”

“He killed your lowest-ranking assistant attorney,” Perry said.

“He did what?” Hamilton shouted. “Why does he have to frame every person in this universe?”

“Don’t worry, Hamilton,” Perry said. “The police have him—in your body—in custody.”

“Why, I’ll prosecute his ugly butt off!”

“Watch it, Hamilton,” Tragg said while coming in. “You are presently in his ‘ugly butt.’ ” Tragg picked up a device on the table next to Ludwig’s bed. “Well, what have we here? It looks like his brain-exchanger device. And this on the other table. It looks like his scepter.” He took the two items. They returned to the control room. “Thank you for your cooperation, MotherBrain.”

“The pleasure ain’t mine,” MotherBrain said. Tragg, Andy, and Perry left for the jail. As soon as they left she hit the front of her jar with her face. “Darn it. Why the heck did you let me disengage the cloaking device, Eggplant Wizard?”

“Me?” asked Eggplant Wizard. MotherBrain zapped him with a mild shock. “Yow!”

“Don’t let me do it again.” She turned to Morton. When she scowled, he cringed. “And you are in big trouble, kid. The beatings will now begin.”

* * *

Palace Jail, Palace of Power.

Perry, Tragg, Andy, and Hamilton in Ludwig’s body arrived at the jail cell where Ludwig in Hamilton’s body was residing. Ludwig’s eyes widened when he saw himself. “What? I thought—”

“I know,” Hamilton interrupted, “you thought that you would get away with this. Give me back my body, and I’ll forget this little incident.”

“Easy,” Tragg said. “I’ll take care of that.” He fired Ludwig’s scepter at Ludwig and Hamilton. Hamilton’s body appeared on the outside of the cell and Ludwig’s on the inside.

“Thank you, Lieutenant Tragg,” Hamilton said.

“Do not mention it,” said Tragg. “As for you, Ludwig, you have a trial to which to look forward.”

“I’m afraid not,” Ludwig said. He opened his left hand. His scepter flew from Tragg’s hand to his. He then opened a warp to Metroid with the scepter. “As Dad frequently points out, ‘He who Koopeth and runneth away liveth to Koop another day.’ ” He warped back to Metroid.

“Oh, nuts,” exclaimed Paul. “He’s gotten away again.”

Hamilton scowled. “That evil turtle gives criminals a terrible name. Why doesn’t he go to the place where all unbelievers go when they die?”

“Maybe he ought to,” says Perry. “However, it is not up to us to determine that. Let’s go. I have a feeling that those Bowser Koopas will dream up another plan in time.”

* * *

Control Room, Metroid.

Larry (Bowser)Koopa, always a very sneaky Koopaling in his ways and mentality, was searching through his evil, twisted brain for a plot that would put the Mason-Team subdivision of the N‑Team out of business permanently. This was because those humans had the legal skill needed to resoundingly convince any jury to convict any or all members of the Brain-Team of their crimes and send them to VideoLand’s most impenetrable prisons for eternity. No one had ever escaped from the Diamond Prison of MegaLand, the strongest prison of all, though it had existed for fifteen hundred years.

As the chief justice of the Supreme Court of Koopa, he had to—and usually did—think quickly about the situation at hand, analyze the bare facts, and make a decision within seconds. With his great repartee, his twisted, evil brain was complete. He was now trying to analyze the situation for his wicked older brother. “So, Ludwig, Thine Extreme Evilness needeth an underhanded scheme to end the Mason-Team, true?” he asked.

“True,” Ludwig said. “That is why I came to you, brother. You are the best judge of the Koopa-Courts. Your excellence in the subject is well known. I do hope that—”

“Hang on,” Larry said, his gaze growing distant. “Hang on. Something’s registering.” His lips rounded up slowly into a venomous smile to show that something devious was brewing within his brain. The ends of his lips practically went up to his eyes. He rubbed his hands together as though someone had stepped into and fallen for one of his evil traps. He laughed wickedly. “Incredible. Unthinkable. Extremely evil. Hee, hee, hee! I have the perfect plan. Hee, hee, hee!”

“What is it?”

“It is truly evil. It is extremely horrible. It would put even the legendary Perry Mason behind bars for life, which it hopefully will.”

“What?”

“What do you and the rest of the family know to be my favorite things?”

“Well, let me see,” Ludwig says. “There is evilness, despicableness, sneakiness, craziness, meanness, and—oh, my gosh.”

“And what?” Larry egged on.

“You overly enjoy making love.”

“Yes,” Larry said. “I also enjoy seeing entirely unclothed females. Of course, the trait you mentioned is more integral to my plot.”

“Yes,” Ludwig said. “Kindly get to the point, Larry.”

“Of course. My plan is to—” He whispered the rest of the information into Ludwig’s ear.

After hearing the plan, Ludwig grinned wickedly. “What a plan. Everyone will think that Perry Mason will have committed a nasty crime. Ha, ha, ha! Samus will be on him like a bat out of heck. That plan will have Perry Mason in the prison within one second. But who will actually commit the crime?”

“Who the do you think?” asked Larry. “Me.”

“Sure, why not?” he said pleasantly. He then thought seriously. “No. Wait a minute. So you can get some disease that I refuse to name yet again?” Ludwig demanded indignantly.

“Uh, brother, let’s just—”

“You crazy fool! You are so infatuated by every humanoid female that walks by that I ought to rewire your brain to increase your better judgment, and it will make your vast brain cells realize that having sex is not always appropriate. Your problem is that your desire for pleasure overrides your better judgment, and it causes you to become overly infatuated. You must learn control!”

“Okay, okay! If you don’t want me to do it, who will do it?”

“How about we do another murder instead? Now, I’m beginning to get an idea. Besides, I’m not too hot on your favored activity, you know.”

“Okay,” Larry said. “I thought I could have some fun. Who is going to do this one?”

“Who do you think?” Ludwig whispered the information into Larry’s ear.

Larry smiled most venomously when he had heard the plot.

* * *

October 24.

Perry Mason’s Office, Palace of Power.

Perry Mason entered his office. “Good morning, Perry,” Della said.

“Good morning,” Perry replied. “How are you today?”

“I’m fine,” Della said. “How about yourself?”

“I’m fine,” Perry said. “Guess what today is? October 24, the unluckiest day in VideoLand.”

“Well, the bad luck may come to Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa and his gang.”

“We can only hope,” Perry said. “Somehow, though, I think that the bad luck is going to come to us instead. Not that I really believe in luck, mind you.” The telephone on Perry’s desk emitted three loud rings. “Well, here comes—”

“Here come Lieutenant Arthur Tragg and Lieutenant Andy Anderson,” Tragg said as he led Andy into the office. He looked too predatorily cheerful for Perry’s taste. “I suppose you wonder why we came here. Paul would have reported to you that we were coming, but we regret that we had to detain him at headquarters so he couldn’t.”

“Why is Paul down at headquarters?”

“We had to question him, Perry,” Andy said. “A murder was committed last night.”

“A murder?” said Perry, pretending to be shocked.

“Don’t pretend to be shocked. And guess who was murdered,” Tragg said. “It was the Assistant Prosecuting Attorney, Donovan Fraser.”

“Who is the suspect?” asked Perry.

“We’ll tell you,” Andy said, “but I think you’d better brace yourself. It’s Della.”

“Me?” Della cried. “Why?”

“Your fingerprints were all over the supposed murder weapon,” Tragg said. “Do you carry a gun?”

“Yes,” Della said, “and I have a license, but what would my gun be doing at the murder site?”

Tragg pulled out a warrant. “We were hoping you might tell us, Della. I have a warrant for your arrest for the first-degree murder of Donovan Fraser. Is the gun you own a Palace Basic Revolver .37 Laser-Caliber with the ID numbers 78293?”

Della looked to Perry, who nodded. “I’m sorry to say that that is the precise gun I own.”

“Okay, let’s go down to the station,” Andy said. Tragg led Della out of the office. “Perry, there is something you should know, too.”

“What’s that?” Perry said.

“You are unable to defend Della personally because of court order.”

“Court order?” Perry snapped. “Why shouldn’t I be permitted to defend my own secretary?”

“Take that up with Hamilton, because he said himself that he was planned defend Della.”

“Well, I’ll just go upstairs and have a chat with him.” A code knock sounded on the private door. “Come in.” The door opened to admit Hamilton. “Hello, Hamilton.”

“Hello, Perry,” Hamilton said. “I thought I’d come down and pay my respects. You’ve heard about Della?”

“Yes,” Perry said. “Tragg has just taken her away. What about it?”

“Well, I have a proposition for you. I am of the firm belief that Della would never murder anyone. Certainly, someone stole her laser-pistol, shot Fraser, and left the whole darn thing dumped on Della. I want to defend her, Perry. Will you settle for a partnership agreement on this case?”

“Yes, I shall.”

“Very well. This must be Della’s bad luck day, but she is going to have at least one ounce of good luck. We’ll both be defending her.” Perry and Hamilton shook hands.

“I believe that is good luck. Well, Hamilton, I’ll call Paul and—” Just then, another code knock was rapped on the private door. “Hm. Everyone I want to talk to seems to be coming to me today. Come in, Paul.” The door opened to admit Paul. “What is it?”

“Well,” Paul said, “scuttlebutt at the station is that Della murdered Donovan Fraser. I was detained against my will.”

“I know,” Perry said. “Lieutenant Tragg just took Della away. He was excessively pleased with himself.”

“I know,” said Paul. “Tragg let me leave when he showed up with her.” The phone rang.

Perry picked it up and said, “What is it, Gertie? . . . Oh, she is? . . . Well, send her in.” He hung up. “It is Chief Samus Aran.”

The main door opened to admit Chief of the Vice Squad, Samus Aran. “Hello, Perry,” she said. “Andy’s here, Hamilton’s here, Paul’s here, and Della’s not here. It can only mean that you know what’s going on.”

“Are you working on the case, Samus?” Perry asked.

“Unlike several members of the Homicide Squad,” Samus said, “most members of the Vice Squad believe that Della is not guilty. I happen to be one who believes that she is not. I shall supervise that crazy Lieutenant Tragg in looking for evidence.”

“Okay,” Perry said. “You do so. I have a feeling that some thorough searching must be done to find the real murderer.”

“The preliminary hearing is in a couple of hours,” said Andy. “If there’s not enough defense evidence, she will be bound over for jury trial in superior court.”

“Let’s get to work. We haven’t much time,” Perry said.

* * *

Palace Courtroom, Palace of Power.

Several spectators occupied the courtroom. The entire Brain-Team was present. Kevin served as the bailiff of the court. “All shall rise for the honorable Judge Lana.”

Princess Lana, in her judge’s robes, came in and sat down at the judge’s bench. She brought down her gavel on the gavel block.

“I shall remind the court that ‘thou’ is the singular second-person pronoun in this court, while ‘you’ is the plural.”

“The Court of VideoLand is called to order,” said Lana. “Mr. Carl Snell, please state the charges against the defendant.”

Carl Snell, a deputy attorney who had just become Hamilton Burger’s second in command, read the charges. “The government of VideoLand charges the defendant, Miss Della Street, with murder in the second degree of Mr. Donovan Fraser, the late assistant attorney working for the government of VideoLand. We shall, in this hearing, bring all facts forward which point at the case. We shall also reveal why the defendant murdered the decedent.”

“What is the defendant’s plea?”

Perry, Hamilton, and Della stood. “I plea not guilty, Thine Honor,” Della said.

“The plea is entered. Call thy first witness, Mr. Snell,” Lana said.

“My first witness is the arresting officer, Lieutenant Arthur Tragg,” Snell said. Tragg got up and was sworn in. “Now, Lieutenant Tragg, what observations didst thou make of the decedent, Donovan Fraser?”

“I found that a laser had scorched the wall,” Tragg said. “We found a laser gun belonging to the defendant, Miss Della Street. The gun had her fingerprints all over it. Apparently, the prints were somehow smeared. The gun was a Palace Basic Revolver .37 Laser-Caliber with the ID numbers 78293.”

Snell got a gun off his desk. “And is this the revolver about which thou art talking?” asked he.

Tragg examined the pistol. “Yes, it is.”

* * *

MegaMan was next on the stand as a ballistic expert. “The laser beam was set to kill. Its path of travel was right through the stomach of the decedent.”

* * *

Dr. Wright next testified as the autopsy surgeon. “Yes, I agree with Ballistics Expert MegaMan. The stomach was the most vulnerable spot. The decedent had a slight ulcer in his stomach at the time of the fatal shooting. The internal bleeding caused by the laser could not be stopped. It was, in fact, the bleeding that killed him first, rather than the laser burn damage.”

“Thank you,” said Snell. “Your witness, defense.”

Mason stood as Snell sat. “Now, Dr. Wright, the path of travel for the laser was in the right and out the left, was it not?”

“I object,” retorted Snell. “The paths of entrance and exit are not determinable. We only know that the laser went in one side and went out the other.”

“Overruled,” ruled Lana. “I don’t believe that you are an expert in laser firearms, Mr. Snell. The witness may answer.”

“Thou art correct, Mr. Mason,” Wright said.

“Thank you,” said Perry. “No further questions.”

“The witness may step down,” Lana said. “Call your next witness, Snell.”

Snell said, “I feel I have established a prima facie case, Thine Honor, and I move that the defendant be bound over for jury trial in superior court.”

Hamilton stood. “I object. I believe that this case is riddled with holes.”

Perry calmly got up. “I am inclined to agree with my fellow defense counsel. The case does not seem to be complete.”

“If I may remind the defense counsel,” Snell said with both impatience and calm, “this is only a preliminary hearing. We need not present a watertight case. We must only present enough evidence to bound the defendant over for jury trial.”

“And may we remind thee of the fact that thou saidst that thou wouldst try to bring out all the evidence in this case,” Burger said.

“I still rest my case,” Snell said. “Present your defense case if you wish.”

“We have no case right now, Thine Honor,” said Perry. “We haven’t acquired sufficient evidence. We request a recess so we can continue gathering evidence.”

“Has the prosecutor any objections?” Lana asked.

“Certainly I have an objection,” Snell said. “This is uncalled-for delaying of the hearing.”

“Overruled,” Lana ruled. “Considering the hour, this is a good time to recess. Court is in recess until 13.45 this afternoon.” She brought down her gavel. Everyone stood just before she exited.

As Lana left, Jackson, Perry’s assistant attorney, came to the defendant table. “Perry, they do have plenty of holes in their case.”

Lieutenant Steve Drumm and Sergeant Brice of the Homicide Squad came up. “Hello, Perry, Hamilton, and Jackson,” Drumm said. “Simon Belmont came to L.A. to get me. He explained the situation. What do you need?” Drumm was about as tall as Mason, and he had black hair and a dark suit. Brice was a little shorter and wider around the middle.

“We would like you, Sergeant Brice, and Paul to do some work for us,” Hamilton said.

“Well, Hamilton, I’ll do it for you, but not for Perry, because he—” Brice began.

“Never mind the shenanigans,” Drumm said.

“You may want to investigate that deputy attorney of mine,” Hamilton suggested.

“You mean Carl Snell himself?” Paul Drake asked.

“Yes, I mean him, Paul,” Hamilton said. “I have my suspicions about him. Also, ring up Maurice Linton at my office. He may help you investigate. Pay a call on Metroid, too. I have a feeling that they’re behind this murder.”

“Get as many of your assistants as you can on the job, Paul,” Perry said.

“Right,” Paul said. “Unfortunately, if they’ve perfected it, they can engage their cloaking device, and then we won’t be able to open any warps there.”

“I doubt it,” said Perry. “Get going.” Paul left.

Kevin came to them. “Perry, will you get Della off the hook? For some reason, I just know that she did not murder Donovan Fraser.”

“That’s why he has us on the job, Kevin,” Drumm said. “We’ll bring the murderer to justice.”

“Then I’ll help you,” Kevin said. “I’ll make sure that no one gets in your way.”

“Like heck thou wilt,” MotherBrain suddenly called from the courtroom door. Laughing, she rolled out of the courtroom.

“Why, that evil, crazy brain,” said Kevin. “She is one of the vilest beings whose acquaintance I have ever had the distinct displeasure of making.”

“Yes,” said Perry, “that is true. Let’s get to work. It is only a few hours before court reconvenes.”

* * *

Perry Mason’s Office.

Perry was pacing the floor of his office. A trio of rings was blasted out by the phone on Perry’s desk. Lieutenant Tragg came into the room a second later. “Hello, Tragg,” said Perry.

“Don’t you dare even mutter ‘hello’ to me,” Tragg snapped. “I know what you’re trying to do. You’re trying to make the Homicide Department look darned stupid again. You even have Steve on your side this time.”

“Why is it any of your business?” asked Perry.

Lieutenant Andy Anderson came in. “I’ll explain this, Tragg,” he said. “Perry, Steve found some evidence that may be very interesting.”

“Good news or bad news?”

“I’ll tell you what it is, Perry,” Tragg said. “It’s bad news for us and good news for you. You get all the breaks!”

A few code knocks sounded on the private door. “Come in, guys,” said Perry. The door opened to admit Kevin, Paul Drake, Hamilton Burger, Lieutenant Steve Drumm, and Sergeant Brice.

“You lucked out, Mr. Mason,” Kevin said.

“Why, Kevin?” asked Perry. “Will someone please tell me what is going on around here?”

“I’d be delighted, Perry,” Hamilton said. “We have some evidence from Maurice Linton that may prove to be Carl Snell’s undoing.”

”How so?”

“Well,” Paul said, “it’s like this.” Perry frowned as they related the tale to him.

* * *

Palace Courtroom.

Lana hit the gavel block with her gavel as court reconvened. “Court will come to order. Will the prosecutor please state formally whether or not he wishes to continue his case against the defendant?”

“I have no more witnesses,” Snell said. “I move that the defendant, Miss Della Street, be bound over for jury trial in Superior Court on the charge of murder in the second degree.”

“Does defense wish to present a case at this time?”

Jackson stood up at the defense table. “We do, Thine Honor,” he stated. “As our first witness, we wish to call Mr. Maurice Linton.”

“Mr. Maurice Linton will rise and be sworn,” Lana said. Linton got up, was sworn, stated his name and occupation, and took the stand.

“I ask thee what reason the defendant had to kill the decedent, Mr. Donovan Fraser,” Jackson said.

“Definitely none,” Linton answered in a rather harsh tone. The question had upset him.

“I apologize if I offended you, Mr. Linton. I now ask you if the prosecutor had any reason to kill the defendant.”

The courtroom was stunned with silence for a moment. Then, Snell leapt to his feet. “I object!”

Lana frowned at Snell. “Because of thine attitude, I am going to overrule the objection. The witness shall answer.”

“He definitely did have something to gain,” Linton said. “The position of assistant prosecuting attorney is a most covetable position. Fraser earned his right to take that job. So, I would say that, yes, Mr. Snell had reason to kill Fraser.”

Hamilton stood up. “May it please the court, I would like to continue Mr. Jackson’s questioning.”

“Very well,” Lana said. Jackson sat down.

“Mr. Linton, is there anyone who could give Snell that idea?”

“Objection,” exclaimed Snell again.

“Overruled,” Lana said. “Mr. Linton, answer the question.”

“Well, sir, Prince Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa could have told him that,” Linton said.

“And how dost thou know that this could occur?” Burger asked.

“I overheard His Highness informing the prosecutor that this could happen,” said Linton. “Prince Ludwig gave the idea to Snell. I have the audio recording to prove it.”

“Excellent,” said Hamilton. “We have no further questions.” He turned to Snell. “Thy witness.”

Growling, Snell slowly ascended from his seat. “No questions.”

“Thou mayest step down, Mr. Linton,” Lana said. “Call thy next witness, Mr. Jackson.”

“Thine Honor, I call Lieutenant Steve Drumm,” Jackson said. Drumm got up, was sworn, stated his full name and occupation, and sat down. “Who asked thee to look for evidence, Lieutenant Drumm?”

“Mr. Burger and Mr. Mason asked Paul Drake, Sergeant Brice, and me to seek useful defense evidence, Mr. Jackson,” Drumm said.

“And what did you discover?”

“We discovered the fact that Prince Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa contacted the prosecutor, Carl Snell and spun quite a tale for him. In essence, if Donovan Fraser died or was killed, Snell would be second-in-command in the Attorney Office of Hamilton Burger, a position that would earn great respect and political power.”

“Thank you,” Jackson said. “No more questions.”

Hamilton got up. “Now, Lieutenant Drumm, it is a well-known fact that Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa is one of the most evil and devious persons in the history of VideoLand. Why in the world would Snell listen to him?”

“Greed, I would say.”

“Thanks,” Hamilton said. “That is all.”

Perry ascended from his seat. He got ready to say something, then changed his mind. “No questions,” he said.

Carl Snell was now getting very angry. “No questions,” he said, fighting to keep his cool.

“The witness may step down,” Lana said. “Call your next witness, defense.”

Mason got up. “I wish to call my assistant, Hamilton Burger,” he said. Burger got up, was sworn, stated his full name and occupation, and sat down. “Mr. Burger, from thy past experiences, what hast thou found out about Snell?”

Hamilton cleared his throat obviously. “I have found him to be a greedy, hot tempered, and selfish lawyer, but he is quick and efficient and accurate, more often than not. His efficiency, speed, and accuracy are the only traits that earned him his position. I should probably have given more thought to the more negative aspects of his personality, but I was quite short-handed when I began hiring assistant prosecutors.”

“What didst thou like about Fraser?”

“I found Fraser to be an easy-tempered, unselfish, quick, and efficient lawyer. He had ambition, but he kept it reined in when he needed to. That is why he was second in rank.”

“Whom didst thou find the most trustworthy, Mr. Burger: Donovan Fraser, Carl Snell, or Maurice Linton?”

“I object!” Snell bellowed.

“Overruled,” said Lana. “Thou hast a seat, Mr. Snell. Must we use crazy-glue to make thee use it?”

“No thanks, Thine Honor.”

“Fraser and Linton were equally trustworthy,” Burger said. “I don’t know about Snell. That’s why I assigned him to handle few important cases.”

“No further questions,” Perry said.

“No questions,” Jackson said.

Snell was obviously restraining extreme anger. “No questions.”

“Thou mayest step down, Mr. Burger,” Lana said. “Call your next witness, defense.”

“We call Mr. Carl Snell,” Jackson announced dramatically.

“I object!” Snell cried. “I am not a competent witness.”

“Overruled,” ruled Lana, tired of the word. She was angry with that man. If he were not guilty, she would fine him a thousand pounds just for these nasty objections. In fact, she was sorely tempted to abuse her royal authority in disciplining him right now. “Take the stand, or I’ll hold thee in contempt of court.” Fuming, Snell was sworn, stated his name and occupation, and sat in the witness chair, ready to object to each question.

“Didst thou have a conference with Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa?” Jackson asked.

“I refuse to answer on the grounds that it may incriminate me,” Snell said.

“No further questions,” Jackson said.

Hamilton got up. “Now, Mr. Snell—never mind. No questions.”

“No questions at this time,” Perry said.

“The witness will step down,” Lana said. “Your next witness, defense.”

“There is one witness whom I shall call,” Jackson says, “but who might be most uncooperative.” He cleared his throat. “The defense calls Prince Baron Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa, ruler of the Kingdom of the Evil Koopas, to the stand.” Ludwig von(Bowser)Koopa went to Kevin, was sworn in, stated his full name, and took the stand. “I take it thou enjoyest thy nominal embellishments.”

“Well, it’s my full name, Mr. Jackson,” Ludwig said. “Some day, I’ll just shorten it to ‘Emperor Ludwig.’ Please pose thy first question.”

“Didst thou have a conference with Carl Snell?” asked Jackson.

“Yes, I did, Mr. Jackson. Dost thou want all the details?”

“Yes, if it pleases thee,” said Jackson.

“In fact, it does. I drew him into my web by offering to tell him how he could advance his career. He paid me the price of £2 156, and I told him that the only way that he would be able to take one of the most respectable jobs in VideoLand was to have Donovan Fraser killed and make it look like someone else did it. He should have known that Linton had followed him. I certainly knew that. Anyway, he listened to what I knew about the position of the highest-ranking deputy attorney. He said that he must have the job. I then monitored his actions. I found that he wore heat-pattern-resistant gloves, took Della Street’s laser-pistol—People’s Exhibit A—shot Donovan Fraser off-guard, and left the gun there. He then went back triumphantly to his home where he slept until precisely 8.00 the following morning.”

Snell sprang to his feet. “You traitor! I promised to grant you complete immunity. What do you do but spill the beans!”

“It was thou who followedest my plan, Mr. Snell,” Ludwig said. “I set the perfect trap for thee. I intended to show thy greed. I showed, furthermore, that thou wouldst let an innocent person go to prison for life for what thou didst. I am glad that I did what I did. Now that thou’st shown thy true colors, I shall leave with my teammates back to Metroid and recloak the planet, since I have perfected my cloaking device.” He turned to Lana. “With the court’s permission.”

Lana sighed. “I’ll probably regret this, but thou art free to do so.”

“What about me?” asked Snell. “What shall I do? Where shall I go?”

“Frankly, my dear Snell,” said Ludwig, “I don’t give a flying flip. Come, Brain-Team. Let’s leave for Metroid.” With one swish of his index finger, Ludwig transported the whole Brain-Team and himself instantaneously to Metroid.

“Why don’t you go after that bad guy?” Snell asked.

“Shut up,” Hamilton said. “He proved that I should never have hired thee. That’s why I am not going after him. By the way, thou art fired.”

“What?” Snell cried. Hamilton handed a pink slip to Snell.

“And if you need an attorney, forget about asking us,” Perry said.

Snell sighed. “Dismiss the charges against Della Street. Arrest me.”

* * *

October 25.

Law Library, Mason’s Office, Palace of Power.

The whole N‑Team was in Perry’s comprehensive law library next morning, along with Maurice Linton, and all the police detectives. “Well, that wraps up the ‘Case of the Prosecutor-turned-defender’ and the ‘Case of the Defender-turned-prosecutor,’ ” Perry said. “Hamilton, Jackson, and I defended Della, then the three of us turned around and prosecuted Carl Snell.”

“That could also have been the ‘Case of the Greedy Attorney,’ ” Hamilton said. “To tell you the truth, Perry, I’m not sorry I lost Snell. I am sorry I lost Fraser, though. He was a good and dedicated attorney. Fortunately, Linton here is a good attorney, as well. He should have been Snell’s superior.”

“No, I should not have been,” Linton said.

“Why not?” asked Hamilton.

“Because, Hamilton, I might not be around either. Snell would have attempted to shoot me, and you could have lost an eyewitness.”

“That is true,” Hamilton said.

Perry and Hamilton shook hands. “Well, Hamilton,” Perry said, “you did a good job defending Della.”

“What’s this ‘you’?” asked Hamilton. “It should be ‘we.’ ”

“Thank you,” Della said. “If Perry gets in trouble with the law, I’ll call you.”

“Oh,” remembered Hamilton. “I almost forgot, Della. You promised to pay me one pound. Where is it?”

“I’ll write a check, if that’s okay,” Della said. Hamilton nodded, though thinking it quite odd to write a check for one pound. She got out a checkbook. When she finished, she handed the check to Hamilton. When he read it, his jaw dropped. Instead of one pound, she was paying him one thousand!

“Well, thank you, Della,” he cried.

“You’re welcome, Hamilton,” Della said.

“Well,” Perry said, “that’s a rap, as they say.”

“You’re right,” Tragg said. “A murder rap on Carl Snell.”

“He’s to be sent to the Crystal Prison in MegaLand tonight,” Lana said. The Crystal Prison was an impenetrable and inescapable place. It was fortified completely by diamond, the hardest substance known.

“Thank you, Perry, for not wavering your loyalty from a client,” Della said.

“I’ve told you before, Della,” Perry said. “If I ever waver my loyalty from a client, you are to close the office and use paint remover to remove the letters ‘Perry Mason—Attorney at Law’ from the door.”